Wednesday, April 27, 2011

reading and writing strategies as sef support

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be directed by the resistance to use the tools as support instead of directing myself and applying them to allow myself to see for myself their worth and value

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to resist using the tools and strategies as self support and thus have allowed myself to be directed by this resistance and not by self, as the directive principle of myself

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to become impatient when I think about implementing tools and strategies and have allowed myself to be directed by this impatience, not realizing the impatience is an indication for me to stop and see what I am resisting, as all resistance is of the mind and not of self.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to direct myself according to the feeling of impatience and not direct myself from the starting point of self

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to reject applying these tools because I want to be special and within this I forgive myself that I’ve allowed myself to believe that accepting these tools would be admitting that I am structured like everybody else

I forgive myself that I’ve’ accepted and allowed myself to reject applying these tools because I fear losing myself within the mechanics of the strategies, not realizing I have already lost myself within the mechanics of the mind, thus I forgive myself for not allowing myself to realize that as long as I am directed by and of the mind I am in fact mechanic, and not of life as self expression

I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to realize that strategies are supporting me through giving me a structure to which I can express myself more clearly, I forgive myself that I’ve allowed myself to define structure as “bad” thus separating myself from structure, instead of redefining the word ‘structure’ and aligning it with equality, and using it as a tool of self support for clarity and order

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to want to continue with ranting and raving, not realizing that this “game of association” is a game of the mind and I am not the directive principle when I continue writing only as an outflow of the mind.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to fear directing my writing through strategies because it would mean I have to take responsibility for the result, thus I forgive myself that I’ve allowed myself to fear being accountable for myself and my writing

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to want to hold on to my old habits from fear of changing and losing myself, instead of realizing that I am not defined by my old habits thus will not lose myself by changing them and myself.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to define myself as the writing habits that I have

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to define myself as an associative writer, and not wanting to let go this definition of myself, instead of realizing that I am limiting myself to one form of expression instead of allowing myself to expand and equalize myself to all form and ways of writing and self expression.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to limit myself within the definition of being an associative writer and not allowing myself to expand and allow myself to use tools to support myself as my writing.

I realize the resistance to apply these strategies is based on fear of changing, based on the self definition I have allowed myself to see myself as. I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to be directed by fear of change, I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to limit myself as what I believe myself to be, not allowing myself to expand as life

I realize the resistance to apply these strategies is based on wanting to be special and being able to do it my way, not admitting that we are all equal and thus can be supported by the same tools.
I realize my resistance is based on the belief that by using these tools/strategies I am admitting that I am weak and of need of assistance, not realizing that this is an ego based fear - wanting to be seen as capable and having everything come easy and naturally

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to believe that using tools/strategies defines me as weak, and I haven’t allowed myself to see the simple common sense in using tools for self support and assistance

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to compare myself to other writers that are “natural” based on the assumption they do not use these strategies, and I haven’t realized that some of them actually do use these strategies and that’s what makes them good writers.

I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to see that at the beginning applying these strategies might be difficult and uncomfortable but the more I practice the more the tool will become part of me and I will use it as needed, “naturally” as self support

to learn for yourself about the process of self forgiveness check out the desteni I process, at www.desteniiprocess.com

join the SRA training to learn about you, and see how and why you have created your experience the way it is. learn how you can change yourself to become the directive principle of yourself. start living for the first time, by birthing yourself as life from the physical

thanks

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